Are you ready to date — or do you just want to be? There’s a difference, and this episode of Coming Out and Beyond is here to help you figure that out.
Anne-Marie is joined by the wonderful Barbara Rowlandson — dating coach, psychotherapist, and co-host of our monthly dating segment — for an honest, warm, and often hilarious conversation about what it really takes to step into the dating world as a woman who has come out later in life.
From the chaos of the “messy middle” to love bombing red flags, from building queer community to figuring out who you even are after decades of partnered life — this episode covers it all.
In this episode, we talk about:
- Why building community should come before dating (and where to find yours)
- The time and energy dating actually requires — and how to know if you have it
- What it means to know yourself well enough to say no to the wrong person
- Red flags and why being ghosted is actually a gift
- The importance of vulnerability — and the brick walls we don’t know we’ve built
- Why the queer dating pool is smaller, and why that changes the rules
- Catalyst relationships: what they are, what they open up, and how to survive them
- Intimacy, readiness, and what “getting it on” really means for women like us
- The surprising role of menopause in why so many women come out in their late 40s and 50s
Next month’s dating episode: We’re talking about dating while you’re still married — and what love bombing looks like and how to protect yourself. Don’t miss it.
🔗 Resources Mentioned
📥 Dating Readiness Guide (free download from Lavender Dating) — Self-assess where you are on the readiness scale before you dive in. 👉 www.lavenderdating.com
📥 Maybe I’m Not Straight Guide — The best of our work on coming out later in life, all in one place. If you’re in the messy middle, this one’s for you. 👉 https://annemariezanzal.com/maybe-im-not-straight-guide/
🌸 Join Authentically Us — Our Mighty Networks community for women navigating identity transitions later in life. Community, connection, and people who get it — ready and waiting for you. 👉 annemariezanzal.com
🗓️ This Authentic Life Cohort — Our 16-week group coaching program starts in May. Come through the messy middle with a whole cohort beside you. 👉 annemariezanzal.com
💌 Work with Barbara Rowlandson — Dating coaching for women in exactly this season of life. 👉 Book a free connection call here: https://calendly.com/lavender-dating-team
