Have you ever found yourself asking that question of the person you're dating? Situationships can be very confusing and hard on the heart. One minute, you're enjoying time together, relaxed, and having fun. The next minute, it seems like she doesn't have the time of...
Articles & Resources
Later in Life
My Later In Life Story by Dr. Robin Sesan, Ph.D. & Couples Therapist
Hi. I am Robin Sesan. A late 60ish cis-gender woman, white, Jewish, and later in life lesbian. I am also a psychologist, a couples’ therapist, an artist, a mother to two adult children, and a doting cat mom to Buffy. But these labels, though true, barely scratch the...
Eight Myths We Need to Let Go of About The Lesbian Community
Eight Myths We Need to Let Go of About The Lesbian Community When you came out did you realize that you may have been ill-informed about the lesbian community? That there are a lot of myths created by a heteronormative society that are simply not true? So if you are...
Lesbian U-Hauling…is it a real thing?
One of the many things my clients ask me about, especially if they are coupled, is about the infamous lesbian "U-Haul" phenomenon. If you’re not familiar, the term refers to the stereotype that lesbians tend to move in together quickly after starting a romantic...
Maybe I Am Not Straight: Navigating the Fear of Late-Life LGBTQ+ Identity
The author and her wife Tonda McKay. Anne-Marie came out at 52 and Tonda came out at 22. So, you're here, reading this, because maybe, just maybe, you're starting to question something fundamental about yourself. Maybe you've been feeling this way for a while, but...
Outside the Heteronormative Model – How Lesbian Relationships Are Different by Barb Rowlandson
Outside the Heteronormative Model - How Lesbian Relationships Are Different by Barb Rowlandson. Many of us experience what could be described as a "second adolescence" when we come out in adulthood – primarily because we may not have fully experienced our first, at...
Eight Things I Wish I Knew Before Coming Out
by Barb Rowlandson So, you've figured out you're not as straight as you previously thought you were. Congrats! Though it might seem a little bit scary, you’re about to embark on a remarkable journey. The ranks of late-in-life lesbians are ever-increasing. Though you...
Signs That You May Not Be Straight
https://youtu.be/xKoIpC_EapI There is a saying in the later in life LGBTQIA+ community: "Straight girls don't lie awake at night wondering if they are gay." When I heard that for the first time it was an "aha" moment for me. Listen to my wife Tonda McKay talk about...
Religious Trauma and the Later in Life LGBTQIA+ Community – Anne Marie Zanzal
https://youtu.be/psQN11tpUz0 The Global Center for Religious Research (GCRR) hosted the 2nd Annual International econference on Religious Trauma, which gathered together specialists, psychiatrists, and researchers from all over the world to discuss the causes of...
Why Lesbians U-Haul?
We’ve all heard the joke. What does a lesbian bring with her on the second date? A U-Haul truck. The picture accompanying this article is a play on this joke. My wife and I were only moving some furniture and wanted to make our queer friends...
When This Long Time Out Lesbian Dated a Newbie
By Tonda Mckay I have been out forever and five years ago I began dating a newly out woman. We were both in our early fifties. We all know there are a million ways to come out and all ages at which to take that first step. I tried one straight relationship...
What Does it Mean to Change Your Life Midlife?
We all expect to have a lot of changes in our lives when we identify as teenagers and young adults. For some reason we expect the rest of our lives to have much more stability, but in actuality the old saying “change is the only constant in life” is true. ...